Nana Gets Me the Shoes

Nana Gets Me the Shoes

12/07/04

I have been wearing my burgundy shoes for a while, but Nana couldn’t have known that, since she just came from China three days ago.  Yesterday I took her to the Aquarium.  And since I was planning to walk a lot, I changed to my sneakers.

This morning, she was a bit cranky, and started to get on my mother’s nerves. So I ask her if she wanted to come with me and take Lily to school.  She was very happy about the offer, and let me put jacket and shoes on her.  Then, I went to deal with Lily and getting her ready, and also went to finish up something in the kitchen. That’s when I saw Nana brought over my sneakers one by one, putting down at the kitchen door, saying “Mommy de! (Mommy’s)”.

How she knows! And she wouldn’t let Lily help. :-)

1 yr

YOUR Chinese Dream

YOUR Chinese Dream

11/14/04

Saturday morning, 7:22am, Lily woke me up and told me, "Mommy, I had a Chinese dream... I had five dreams."

"Tell me about them."

"One, two, three..."

I gave up.  I was still sleepy, so I wished she wouldn't insist on getting up. She didn't.

"When I finish with your Chinese dream, I'll give it back to you, OK?"

I was really sleepy...

8:35, Lily stirred again. This time I was awake as well.  So I asked her what happened in her Chinese dream.

"No! YOUR Chinese dream...  There is Chinese, Chinese everywhere... So it is Chinese dream!"

She added :"Chinese sticker on his belly. That's so funny. Haha... Do you think it's funny? I think it's so, so funny... Stuck a sticker to his belly..." 
 
 
  

3 yr 9m

Good Deal

Good Deal

11/13/04

Saturday, we had a late breakfast, late lunch...

Towards evening, I was trying to rearrange some furniture.  Knowing I have enough leftover food for dinner, I was in no hurry for cooking.

Near 8:30pm, Lily came to me and said: "Mamà, You go cook dinner, ok?" This was unusual enough, since she always ask for candy when she is hungry.  Then, she went on, as if she is try to offer me a good deal: "You go cook dinner, I come and sit down and eat, ok?!" She was nodding her head with great encouragement.

I must looked a bit surprised and amused.  And for a moment, I was not moving.  So Lily tried to push my hand, pointing me to the kitchen and said:"Go! Go, go..."

Ha, ha... Well, dinner was ready in three and half minutes.  Funny how she tries to negotiate a dinner out of me. ;-) 
     
     

3 yr 9m

Love

Love

11/03/04

Last 2~3 days Lily was watching "Little Mermaid" 3~4 times. Tonight, she was engaged in other things.

When it was time to sleep, she wanted to take her big horse to bed. I granted her wish.

Two minutes into bed, Lily asked me a question out of nowhere:"Mamà, why Mermaid love Prince? Why she no love her father?"
"She loves her father too."
"But if he bring Prince home, Father will be angry!
:-("

Amazing how kids actually think about anything any moment.
Here is another moment that shows that I'm actually dumb.  I don't know how to explain things to a three-year-old. I'm not sure if I could any time soon.  I'd better think about it now and get ready.

Really, fathers often do, even mothers.  They should know, how their Lilyko thinks about this matter even at this age.  Shouldn't it be a comfort?  Shouldn't it make them be more gentle and sensitive to the daughter's feelings, in the future?

3 yr 9m

I Can Hear Her Crying

10/27/04

I Can Hear Her Crying
Running down the staircase into the subway station, I heard a loud crying from a little girl approximately three years old.  Somehow, my heart was aching.  "Oh, Jeeesus!" I can hear myself saying inside.

Her mother was dragging her through the subway turnstile, while the little girl was crying: "Mommy, I want candy!..."  They remind me of Lily and me.  It feels like those out-of-body experience, looking at myself from above.  I took a glance at the mother's face, emotionless, just like mine always was.  Her dragging hand was firm, just like mine always was.  I can believe she feels right doing this, since, I always felt that was the right thing to do.  Yet, at this moment, I feel guilty and pain.  Seeing myself from above, I wish I hadn't done that.  I believe I would be a bit more lenient next time.

Sure I understand the potential danger of spoiling the child when I consider sparing the rod.  But, isn't it also a question just how much 'rod' should mothers use on our children?  Yes, Lily is very stubborn.  Is that really so bad, considering how hard life is going to be for her in the future?  How much of our discipline aimed for our convenience of managing our life, instead of aiming at molding them for a better future?  Isn't there any fraction of our frustration released into discipline our children?  And don't we always find justification for our action?

How hard should I discipline my child?  I really don't know.  May God give me moments of reflection like this, so I can check my action from time to time.

I can hear her crying, my Lily's.  I can hear people passing by and saying:
"Oh, Jeeeeesus!!!" 
    

3 yr 8.5 m

Big Help

10/23/04

Big Help
For 2-3 weeks now, oftentimes Lily would help me clean up the table after dinner. :-)  It was all voluntary, I've never asked her to help.

About two weeks ago, one evening after dinner, I collected some dishes and started to wash.  Lily finished juice and gave her cup to me.  I thanked her with a pleasant voice.  The next thing I knew was her bringing all the dishes to me one after another.  After she fished all dishes, she started to bring me leftover food.  I was afraid that she was going to spill something all over her.  There was one bowl with some soup in it, so I greeted her half way before she fed it to her shirt.  Finally, she went away with a great smile of satisfaction.  Maybe she liked my sweet appraisals, or maybe she is happy that she made me happy, or maybe she felt a great accomplishment doing all that by herself.  I know not.  She often does that ever since.

 

* * * 

Last night, when I stood up after eating, she said:" You go there."  I didn't pay attention to what she was saying, went to the sink and put down the dishes. Then I turned around...

"No!!!" she screamed, "Don't come here!"
I stopped, didn't know what was going on. "What's the matter?"
"You stay there... I bring it to you."

I could do nothing but obey her. Remember I always said I am going to teach cooking when she is five just like my mother did? Seems it is going to start sooner. Haha... 
 
 
  

3 yr 8.5 m

"Why Does the House Make Us Hot?"

9/12/2004

"Why Does the House Make Us Hot?"
One night, as we were laying in the bed, listening to the music, getting ready to sleep, Lily asked me: "Mommy, why the house make us hot?"

I said:" Because it is hot every where, so it is hot in here too."

But, Lily said :"No, no, no. It is cold outside now, why the house make us hot?"

... I really don't know how to explain all this, so I said: "Because the wall and the closed window stopped the wind from blowing, so we don't feel cold."

"But why?!" she kept on ask.

Really, why? How can I explain? Though I studied Physics, I am not able to explain what a three and half year old could ask. I must be very dumb. :-(

Can any one help?

3 yr 7 m

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"Mommy You're Sick!"

08/09/04

"Mommy You're Sick!"
Lily and I both had a cold for a few days now, and I seem to do worse than she does. Over the weekend, we went to NJ as planed, and had a lot fun BBQ, swimming and fishing.

Monday morning I woke up and found that I've lost my voice.

Lily got up and came to me: "Good morning, Mommy."
"Good morning Lily." I tried my best making some noise to that effect.
"Mommy you're sick!"
"Yes." I whispered. "So maybe you should be a good girl, and not to make me scream at you today?" I'm making it a joke and laughing inside. I wouldn't miss a chance teaching her (or never miss a chance to relate a bad thought).
"Ok." She said, sincerely and full of sympathy.

I was dashing in and out trying to get ready for going to work, when Lily suddenly said: "Mommy I don't want you to go to work."

From time to time, she would be in those mood not wanting to go to school.

"Why?" I asked, pretending to be surprised.

"Because you are sick!" she said, almost in tears. "It's not good for you!"


Now, I am really surprised. Even if she is so smart and taking advantage of the situation for her own benefit, she doesn't seem to be aware of it. Eventually, I took her advice and stayed home. We both slept around the clock that day.
 

3.5 yr

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The Big Balloon Pop

07/04/04

The Big Balloon Pop
Sunday night, Lily and I went out trying to see some firework.

As we walk past the playground, we saw a few kids playing with firecrackers. Some popping sound here and there made Lily quite excited. Then, there was a silence.

Since we didn't have enough fun yet, we were wondering and hoping for more. I was trying to see if there could be some colorful firework. Then, we heard this very, very, very loud "Bang!!!", and Lily jumped aside screaming. At the same time, we heard a dog started barking franticly. As I was hugging and comforting her, Lily asked me:      

"Mommy, why is the dog crying?"
"Because he was scared."
"Scared?"
"Yes? It was very loud, you know."

She thought about it for a moment, trying to find words. "But, but... It is just a BIG balloon popped! ..."

 

3 yr 5 m

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Water and the Beautiful Girl

07/01/04

Water and the Beautiful Girl
Lily and I went to the beach after work. On our way home, Lily was a bit cranky... and didn't want to go home. After a little debate, I believe she will not willingly go home anyway. When there was a moment of break of her whining, I offer her to listen to the music from my Tungsten E. She was pleased with the offer, so I played Richard Clayderman's piano for her.

After a little while, she asked me to repeat ONLY the first song (It was Ballade Four Adeline). So I set it the way she wished for.

When we got off the train, as we were walking through the playground near our home, Lily pulled my dress and asked,        

    "Mommy, what's mean? What it does mean?"
    "What does what mean?"
    "What the song mean, Mommy?"
    "You want to know what does the song mean? What story is the music telling?"
    "Yes!" she seem to be happy that her dumb mother could finally understand her.
    "It is about..." I wanted to tell her the title of the music, but how would that be of a help? So I said: "It is about water, and a beautiful girl playing with water."
    "Oh!" Her eyes brighten up, and she seems having no trouble understand that, "Is it about me? Lilyko playing water?"

No wonder she understood! :-)

3 yr 5 m

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Dangerous Eyes

05/22/04

Dangerous Eyes
This morning, I woke up Lily and trying to dress her for the school. As I was walking towards the kitchen, I heard Lily saying: "Mommy, my eyes is dangerous"

    "What's that? Lily?" I didn't quite get what she was saying.

    "My eyes is dangerous." She was rubbing her eyes.

    "Really!? Is your eye going to hurt me?" Since I remember how we explain to her what dangerous means.

    "No. It is going to hurt ME!"

 

3 yr 3.5 m

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Lily had a Bad Dream :-(

03/30/04

Lily had a Bad Dream :-(
This morning, I was wakened up by Lily's sobbing.

"Lily, why are you crying? You had a bad dream?"
"My umbrella is going away! I can't find my umbrella. :-(
woo woo . . .
Raining, and cold . . .
My umbrella flew away!
I go . . . and Inna (her teacher) going away. woo woo. . .
My friends love me. And my umbrella's gone! . . . "
:-(

She's probably feeling cold right now, since she is dreaming of rain. Anyway, no use telling her dream is not real. It makes her feel sad still.

"Lily, do you want to come under Mommy's cover?  We get up soon and go to school to find Inna and friends, ok?  We go find the umbrella, ok?"

What should I say to her?  I don't have any good idea at this moment.  And what should I say when she is hurt by real life in the future?

Why did she have a bad dream?

3 yr 2 m

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03/27/04

"I am Sick."

It is Saturday. Around noon, Lily came to me and said: "Mommy, I am sick."
"Really? Why are you sick?"
"Because, I want yogurt to make me better."
:-)    

3 yr 1.75 m

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Sculpture

Sculpture

03/24/04

Lily has always been a self-content person, though she always welcome a playmate. I try to play with her as much as I could. But I have so much to take care of, that I don't think I would ever play enough with her. So, I try my best to be creative, giving her something new to do from time to time, keeping her busy and happy, at least.

These days I spend a lot of time on computer, trying to finish few projects before the trip to China.

After dinner, I sat down in front of computer again. Few minutes after I stared working, a thought came to me:

She should be happy to do some sculpturing at this age, especially, she have seen enough from the TV ('Art Alive' from Noggin). But how can I give her something to do that? Somehow, I don't like those material from the store. She is too young for that.  

But... Hey, a dough would be good. It cost nothing, and it can be easily cleaned up. The only reason I never thought of that, is because we are so used to treat it as food, and food is not for playing. But I still remember how happy I was, at age of five, anytime when Mom makes dumpling, she would give me a piece of dough to play with (so I won't go mess up her stuff) ;-).

So I got up, and said to Lily: "Come on, let's do some sculpturing." She seems to be excited, and followed me to the kitchen. I am not sure if she knew exactly what we were about to do.
 
I took a spoonful of flour, mixed with some water, and made a dough as big as an egg. When give it to her, she was so excited, opened up her eyes and said: "Oh, Scu..ulp..ture!"

After settling her down (She wanted to sit on the bed) and gave her a tray to play sculpture on, I went back to my computer.

There was half-hour waiting time once in a while, and I would use that to play with Lily or do things around the home.

When I came to play with Lily, I could see her sculpture is going no where. So I said to her: "Lily, let's play together. Mommy show you how to make it." So I took half of the dough, and gave her the other half.

Two seconds later, she reach out and took the dough from my hand and trying to say something. I can see her hesitation, so I asked:

"Lily, you don't want Mommy to help you?"
"... "
"You don't want Mommy to play with you?"
"Mommy..." She was trying very hard. Then she pointed at my desk: "Can you be busy in computer?"

Ha ha...

So I left her alone.

3 yr 1.5 m

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Chocolate

Chocolate

03/22/04

I am not a candy eater, and I could never know how attractive a piece of chocolate could be. Since I don't like the idea for kids to eat much sweet, I always try to let Lily have them as little as possible.

I notice that whenever Lily is hungry, the first thing she would think of is ice-cream, chocolate or candy. So I set a rule with her, that she can only have sweets AFTER meal. Almost always, after dinner, she doesn't care much for sweets any more, and I was never honest enough to remind her of our deal.

Tonight, right before bed time, Lily said that she was hungry.

“I want a BIG chocolate Mommy. And I don't want to eat dinner.”
“Ok, Lilyko, I will give you a little...”
“I want BIG chocolate...”
“Ok, Lily. I will give you a little milk... and a piece of cookie.”
“I want chocolate Mommy.”
“No cookie?”
“No cookie!”
“But you will have just this one. Ok?”
“Ok!”
“No more?”
“No more!”
“Alright then, go to the table and sit down.” I said. So she went.

I usually would put her chocolate in a little container so that she wouldn’t make a mess around (doesn’t always work though). But tonight, as I looked around, I saw her little green bowl was on the table right next to her. So I gave her half cup of milk, handed the chocolate to her, and pushed the green bowl towards her. She doesn’t always “remember” her promise, and on occasion, she could even “forget” twice and keep begging for more.

Sure enough, after much fun and mess, after sucking every single figure of hers, I heard: “Mommy, I want more...”

I turned to her and said: “Lily... :-(” I wasn’t going to give in easily.  She knew what I was going to say next, so she looked away. I went back to what I was doing.

“Mommy, you forgot to put the chocolate in the bowl!”

I was quite surprised and amused. I turned to her and trying to think of something to say.

She picked up the Green Bowl from the table and waved at me. “You forgot to put the chocolate in the bowl. You have to put the chocolate in the bowl, you know.” She said, with a very serious look on her face.

Well, who wants to knowingly break the rule... :-)

*********** ******

Sometimes I really wonder: Are kids really so smart? Or I am just imagining all this?

 

3 yr 1.5 m

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" Mommy in my Eyes! "

" Mommy in my Eyes! "

02/25/04

These days, since my parents are back to China, I have to take Lily to the Daycare every day.
This morning, when it is time to wake her up, I walk from kitchen towards her and calling:
"Lily...... Lily Dumbo... it's time to get up... Good morning Dumbo Girl..." Then I heard: "Good morning Mommy Dumbo..." :-) She loves the cartoon 'Dumbo ' so much, nowadays she wants me to call her Dumbo. And it always puts a smile on her face when she hear me calling her that.

I got to the bed, and kissed Lily. She looked up at me with excitement and a big smile, then she said:

"Hello Mommy Dumbo, I have Mommy in my eyes!"
"What was that?" I was a bit surprised,
"Mommy in my eyes." she used a finger pressed on her right eye, then both eyes.
"Ah... you were dreaming? You see Mommy in your dream?"
"Yes. I was dreaming. I have Mommy in my eyes."
" I see. What was Mommy doing?"

"Mommy changing diaper for Naniko." ...Ha ha ha...

It reminds me of a similar story my Aunt told me about my cousin when he was a baby. I can still see the smile on my Aunt's face while she was telling me that story. Time won't fade these memories as we grow old. I believe we all have these moments, so do our parents. Let's remember these more often.

3 yr 0.75 m

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Nana Found Her B...;-)

02/05/04

Take a look at your silly baby! See the file by alphabet order.
Yan

********
I am so thankful to the camera. There is no way to write about this story. :-)

1 yr 2 m

 

Nana has found her B...,

and it tickles ;-)...

Hug her, Kiss her, and tell her…

2/5/2004

Ever since Lily was born, I always give her few kisses whenever she is in my arm. And very very often, I would tell her “I love you!” at the same time. I was doing this because I believe kids would get more pleasure from it. And it is very important that they clearly feel our love.
Still, I was very surprised one day when this happened. I was working in the kitchen for over 20 minutes, when Lily (one and half year old at the time) came in and walked around me over and over again, trying to get my attention. Then, she stopped behind me, hugged both of my legs, and kissed me, on my legs of cause! This was her first kiss. Sure she got all the attention after that! I just put down my dishes… and went to play with her.

Can you imagine how I feel one day, April 10, 2003 when I was passing by Lily and hear her saying “ I love you! Mommy” … Not surprised, not excited, because I just didn’t believe what I’ve heard. She was only 2 year and 2 month old! Still, I was curious enough to bend down and ask her:

“What did you say?”
“I love you! Mommy.” She said it again.
“Did you say ‘I love you, Mommy’?” I asked.
“Yeah.” She nodded, and smiling at me.

Then, I was surprised, excited, and everything else I could think of doing. But what could I think of doing at this kind of moment? Nothing. Nothing besides hugging her, kissing her, and telling her that I love her.

Nowadays, every so often before Lily goes to sleep, she would ask me to lay next to her for a few minutes. After I lay down, she would ask me to tell her a story or sing a song for her. It was a lullaby before, and recently, after she watched the movie (I got a DVD for her) “Dumbo” she would ask me to sing “Baby Mine” from the movie. I usually would rub her from head to toe when I am singing. And very often I would get a big hug and kiss as my reward, before she tells me: “You go to your pillow now, Mommy.” Every now and then, she would tell me: “I love you, you know?” And some times, she would give me a long list of who she loves: “I love Daddy. I love Nai Nai, … Ye Ye… Naniko… Babua… Bebia… Kevin… Dudu… Carrie… Jiu Jiu… Jiu Ma… Niko…” There are even moments, that a birdie and star would join in the list.

Dear be-mentioned, I am not sure if Lily ever tells you directly, but she loves you. Don’t blame me for loving her too much. I simply do. And I will do the same to Nana too.

And here is what I want to tell you: Hug your baby, Kiss your baby, and tell your baby “I love you”.

If we love our baby (what a surprise!), they deserve to know, and You deserve to know that they know. Often time, we take that for granted.

Enjoy!

3 yr

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Birthday Wish

Birthday Wish

02/02/04

Dear Yan,
 
Bebia Valya wanted to write a message to you herself personally. Naturally she wrote it in Russian and asked us – Inna and me to translate it. We have done the job though it has been rather hard work to do.

We have just known about your having trouble in reading our recent message. Don’t worry, we will repeat everything what was said in that message. Here is Bebia’s letter translated. We – Inna and I join her in everything she is saying.

Dear Yan,
We all – Babua Benito, mamida Inna and I, Bebia Valya, are sending happy birthday congratulations to our lovely Liliko.  

We do wish we could be with you on Liliko’s birthday so that we could celebrate the day together, and make this day a big and merry holiday for her.  

I am very sorry and I suffer that I could not write in English. Then I personally could have been writing more often because I love you all and I want to be in touch with you more than I am able now. So I have to ask Inna or Benito to translate my writings into English. But it is not so easy for them to do so. I cannot blame them.  

I would like to know more about my lovely things, my Liliko and Nana. I want to know how are they, what new things have they learned, how are they getting on in doing so. I think that Naniko can already run about the house. Does she try to oversmart Liliko in something? Kids are generally getting smart fast. I am sure so is Naniko.  

I understand my dear Yan how hard job every day is for you: going to work, taking care of the kids, running the house, and many more problems. It is very difficult for you to spare the time for yourself. I hope that your Mom is some help for you. God bless her for that. Please, remember us to your Mom and Dad. It was a great pleasure for me and Benito to meet them.  

By the way what are your plans about going to China together. Has anything changed? I mean the time when you are leaving for China, the period of your staying there, and when you are going to be back home.  

We are sending a lot of hugs and kisses to you all and especially to Liliko – one whose name-day it is.  

We are also mentally sending her (in our imagination) a very big toy of the kind she would have been glad to have.  

Here are million roses for Lilyko. With love, Valya, Benito, Inna
P.S. To cancel the picture press Esc.

3 yr

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